Walking with three kids and a dog

Shalom Papillion

Today the kindergarten class had an end of the year program. They invited guests to watch them do their morning prayers (tefillot) and then sang many songs. I sat in the front row watching my daughter sing and perform. I had no camera or video and as I sat there I worried that I would regret not having these moments captured forever, but the worry dissipated when I realized that I prefered to enjoy the moment than to worry about seeing it through the lens of a camera. I do wonder if I will regret not having the video when my little girl is long gone and I am left with only memories of this time in our life. Then we went outside and the teachers brought out the butterflies they have been growing in the classroom. They let them free as we sang "shehechiyanu", a prayer thanking G-d for reaching this day. If I could find the words to capture the look on my daughters face as the butterflies flew off, I would probably not be sitting here writing a blog titled walkingwiththreekidsandadog. I would probably be writing for some respectible publication or have made a living being a writer, but I have never been able to write well enough to find the words to describe a moment like today. I don't have the words now. Many thoughts in my head. I have always thought that one of the things that distinguishes a really good writer from others are the thoughts in their heads and then the subsequent ability to articulate those thoughts. There are time when I believe I have the thoughts and other times I don't believe that. Does everyone walk around with running commentary in their heads? I suppose. Are these thoughts worth capturing? I have recently felt compelled to capture some of my thoughts. Maybe in this process I will discover the writer that I have always wanted to be. Or maybe I will just create lots of meaningless type on a blog. At least I am not wasting paper, just taking up space in cyberspace and I have no idea how that works.
Shalom Pappillion.